Good ol' boy needs help FAST!!!

[Billy J.]

I'll tell you what, I have gotten me a quite bad perdickyment over here.

How do ya' folks get ghoul gunk out of yer jeans. These were my good pair too.

I told Hank to cover my ass from them undead creepy crawlers comin' up from behind. Never saw it comin' neither. There he is one minute an' gone the next. Ungratefull is what he is. I bring em' along and he goes an' lets my good jeans get ghoul gunk all over em'.

Well hank got 'emself dragged off to God knows where, and well, we'll miss Hank. So what choice did I have but to go an' torch the dam place.

I went back topside ya' see and got me that diesel truck from over by the fillin' station. Driver was takin' a dump in the john so I gone an figured he wouldn't mind none; specially with me savin' the world from undead things.

So I drive that there truck up to the graveyard, drop that there hose in a hole, and turn on that there pump. I fill up them tunnels nice and good, an' drop me a lit bottle of tequila down that same hole. Needless to say it was a pretty nice explosion an' all, but I sort of blew away half of this here town, and of course that diesel truck went up like the Fourth of July over Huston. (One moment folks, that brings a tear to m' eye).

Well I done hit the dirt cause I've got me tombstone shootin' off like bottlerockets round me, flames spewin' like a drunk's lunch, and no cover cept for an open grave. Found me one of them gold pocket watches though. Fella was dead so he won't mind.

After bout 10 minutes or so, I checked to see if the coast was clear. Other than looking like Hell on a Vegas bender, I was good. My good jeans were covered in ghoul gunk, but I got me a shiny new watch out the deal so I'm guessin' I came out on top.

So I get's me back in my truck and head into the sunrise. Another day breathin' is another day alive.

I sure do hope that gas truck driver fella wasn't on the can when that fillin' station blew. Man that would be one messed up obichyary.

Next stop Washinton DC folks.

[Holister]

[Hannah]

Hello Billy,

When I clean my Dad's stuff after a night out I find that shampoo does a great job of getting rid of almost any body tissue related stain. You have to make sure to cover the whole stain with it and do a fair bit of scrubbing.

Hannah

PS: Best remove any gunk first of course - you can always put the jeans in the freezer overnight to make that part easier. The frozen tissue will tend to break apart a little cleaner and not make the stain spread while you get it off.

[finder_fee]

Hey Billy, so what are you headed to Washington for anyways?

Fi

[Holister]

That fact worries me greatly; better alert DHS.

[finder_fee]

That fact worries me greatly; better alert DHS.

I was actualy thinking about it....

[Kelly]

Hello Billy,

When I clean my Dad's stuff after a night out I find that shampoo does a great job of getting rid of almost any body tissue related stain. You have to make sure to cover the whole stain with it and do a fair bit of scrubbing.

Hannah

PS: Best remove any gunk first of course - you can always put the jeans in the freezer overnight to make that part easier. The frozen tissue will tend to break apart a little cleaner and not make the stain spread while you get it off.

Thanks Hannah. That suggestion does work. I had to get the blood out of Ben's shirt the other day and I remembered this post of of yours. The blood came right out and after the wash it was as good as new.

[Hannah]

Hi Kelly,

I'm glad it worked.

[RAVEN]

I love this thread.

I had heard a report over the wire about an exploding cemetary. I am very pleased to read this first hand confirmation. I dig your style, Good Old Boy.

I do not, however, think that you need help fast. In fact, you seem to have the situation well in bhand. I will be listening for reports of unusual events (no doubt your handiwork) in the D. of C.
Hannah, do you have any other housekeeping tips for the secret vigilantes?

[Clarity]

_____I didn’t quite understand all the words you posted Mr. Billy, because the dictionary I have didn’t have them, but it sounds like you made a pretty big mess. I guess that’s okay because you were saving the world from undead things, but I think you should still be careful. What if the Driver needed it?
_____P.S. The stains stay if my clothes get dirty.
_____P.S., again. What did you need help with? I’m confused.

[skeptic]

He needed help getting into his straight jacket, apparently.