Kolya v. Sasha

Natasha · Post by **Natasha** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 12:59 pm

Sasha owns a small house somewhere near Moscow (that is as specific as he allows me to get). Kolya, Sasha, and I were there waiting for Roma and Lyosh to show up. I was sitting in his huge comfy chair that faces the television that according to two people has never ever been switched on. I may not even be plugged in. Anyway, I was reading some Mark Twain stories. I heard Sasha ask, "alright are you ready to have your ass kicked?" and Kolya replied, "I'm ready to let you try." And then the usual verbal abuse back and forth started up. I did not get out of the chair. I have grown used to the boys wrestling. It is at least a weekly event. And both of them have gone some time without wrestling each other (well, not Kolya since time was standing still for so long but anyway). This one had a lot of energy to be released.

I could hear them trying to pin each other to the floor (usually with a forearm across the throat) when suddenly a train slammed into the back of the chair, throwing me onto the floor, centimeters from going through the infamous television. I managed to get upright and while sitting I heard vicious growling and name calling, as the chair jostled, as they grappled with each other. Then suddenly Kolya popped up to his feet and Sasha was wrapped around his back; his arms had Kolya in an effective sleeper hold and his legs wrapped around Kolya's hips and thighs. Kolya stepped backwards tripping over the chair using Sasha to break his fall but they just rolled and Sasha maintained the sleeper hold. Kolya's face was turning blue.

"Stop it!" I shouted and ran over to them and started to pummel Sasha's forearms but he probably did not feel it, but then Kolya got to his feet and then Kolya just jumped straight up in the air again using Sasha to break the fall. Sasha had to let go to break his own fall otherwise, he would been sandwiched. The weight of Kolya's body knocked the air out of Sasha and his head snapped back splitting open Sasha's lower lip, about 2 cm down towards his chin. Kolya rolled before Sasha could grab him again.

They both gained their feet and Sasha kicked Kolya like Leonidas kicking a Persian diplomat into a bottomless pit. Kolya tripped over a small table with a lamp on it, rolling over the lamp, destroying it and the table. A small shard of wood was sticking out of his back which he had to pull out, and then as he came up he only made it to one knee before Sasha tried to kick his head off. Kolya cupped his hands and caught Sasha's kicking ankle and pulled with the direction of Sasha's momentum. As Sasha flew by he managed to spin and kick Kolya square on the nose with his other foot, and Kolya's nose erupted into a thick blood flow down out his nostrils. Sasha crashed into his sofa and Kolya jumped to pin him. Sasha rolled out of the way and as he was rolling to his feet Kolya charged and Sasha managed to hip throw Kolya; Kolya's feet scraped the ceiling and arched right through Sasha's ceilling fan destroy it and the light bulbs. Kolya landed with an "oof" and the wind was knocked out of him. His exhaling was strong enough to spray some blood out of his mouth on to me staying 2 meters away looking for a chance to stop the fight.

As Sasha was going for the pin I jumped in front of him and shouted, "Enough!" Kolya was at his feet again. Both were bloody, breathing heavy, and surrounded by broken furniture and shattered light bulbs. "I think The Girl is right," Sasha said. Kolya nodded. "Fair enough."

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 1:26 pm

Shit. You guys are crazy.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 1:34 pm

My nose is broke and his lip is still puffy.
Natasha ended before a clear winner could be decided.

concrete_Angel · Post by **concrete_Angel** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 1:43 pm

Man! You guys should be on ECW. That was just BRUTAL!

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 1:47 pm

I assume this more wrestling talk?

concrete_Angel · Post by **concrete_Angel** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 1:53 pm

All right, I'll stop. Still pretty brutal, though.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 1:59 pm

I don't mind it, just want to know what I am reading, that's all.

It was one of our most brutal ones. They are usually less destructive, and usually end by pin or first blood, whichever comes first.

concrete_Angel · Post by **concrete_Angel** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 2:01 pm

I really need to find those dvds again.

Sorry, thinking out loud.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 2:05 pm

Old tapes of you backyard wrestling with your friends, flipping off your roof onto the trampleline and what not?

Or you mean....ooooooooooooooh...those dvds.

concrete_Angel · Post by **concrete_Angel** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 2:10 pm

Old tapes of other people backyard wrestling. Never had a backyard.

Eilonwy Solstice · Post by **Eilonwy Solstice** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 2:21 pm

I’m glad you stopped it, Natasha. Either of you seriously hurt? I mean, besides a split lip, a broken nose, and a piece of wood sticking out your back? My brothers wrestled like that often, and I know how often men try to shrug off hurts.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 2:23 pm

I did. There was some wrestling but also hand to hand combat, grenade throwing, climbing and rappelling, knife fighting, firearms, and the worst obstacle course I can imagine.

Shadowstalker · Post by **Shadowstalker** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 3:18 pm

You guys are out of your minds.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 3:31 pm

Eilonwy Solstice wrote:I’m glad you stopped it, Natasha. Either of you seriously hurt? I mean, besides a split lip, a broken nose, and a piece of wood sticking out your back? My brothers wrestled like that often, and I know how often men try to shrug off hurts.

Other than those injuries, no. Sasha is much less prettier now, and that is pretty serious, although he will probably shoot for the sympathy angle. Charisma is charisma, after all.

I have to replace the ceiling fan. I never thought I would ever enter IKEA.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 3:32 pm

Shadowstalker wrote:You guys are out of your minds.

Sasha has the paperwork to prove it. I passed my last psyche eval.

GhostSpider · Post by **GhostSpider** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 6:36 pm

Eilonwy Solstice wrote:
I’m glad you stopped it, Natasha. Either of you seriously hurt? I mean, besides a split lip, a broken nose, and a piece of wood sticking out your back? My brothers wrestled like that often, and I know how often men try to shrug off hurts.

Other than those injuries, no. Sasha is much less prettier now, and that is pretty serious, although he will probably shoot for the sympathy angle. Charisma is charisma, after all.

I have to replace the ceiling fan. I never thought I would ever enter IKEA.

Well as long as no one was seriously hurt and everybody had fun. :lol:

Sasha · Post by **Sasha** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 8:09 pm

We wouldn't do it if it wasn't fun.

Ron Caliburn · Post by **Ron Caliburn** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 9:26 pm

Me and my cousins used to go at it like this all the time . . . I remember when Zeb broke my arm . . the second time, the first time I'd been concussed too much to remember the details.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 12:38 am

That's rough.

The worst ever happened to me was Roma stabbled me in the stomach with a k-bar. Fortunately never broken any limbs or collar bones. Or ribs although a few separated here and there from time to time. Mostly in actual combat however.

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 1:57 am

I had all the water sucked out of my right arm by a demon.

GhostSpider · Post by **GhostSpider** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 4:31 am

I had four ribs, an arm, and my collar bone broken by a Baal-Rog.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 9:07 am

Bert_the_Turtle wrote:I had all the water sucked out of my right arm by a demon.

How did it manage just 1 arm? Killed it before it sucked you dry?

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 9:08 am

GhostSpider wrote:I had four ribs, an arm, and my collar bone broken by a Baal-Rog.

Yea this was just Sasha though. Hehe.

DarKnyht · Post by **DarKnyht** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 11:16 am

Kolya wrote:
Shadowstalker wrote:You guys are out of your minds.
Sasha has the paperwork to prove it. I passed my last psyche eval.

Just because you passed a psyche evaluation you are not exempt you from being a twisted individual. :wink:

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 11:27 am

That is true, yes.

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 1:24 pm

Kolya wrote:
Bert_the_Turtle wrote:I had all the water sucked out of my right arm by a demon.
How did it manage just 1 arm? Killed it before it sucked you dry?

It did so as I crashed into it and knocked it down a mineshaft.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 1:44 pm

Oh it's that story. My bad.

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 1:47 pm

Hehe, yeah. *That* story.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 1:54 pm

It has been a long time since I browsed through the Roll Call.

Ron Caliburn · Post by **Ron Caliburn** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 9:28 pm

I thought we were tlaking injuries from aggressive training and playful scrapping rather than work related.