I'm sure some of you are wondering why I've hardly posted at all in the past few days...

...no? None of you?

Well, bleh to you, too. =P

Anywho, I just finally got some peace of mind in the form of a new car. My Neon died, stranding me by the roadside some three blocks from work, yesterday. I was watching it deteriorate for the past week or so, but didn't know what was wrong, or how to fix it. By the time I had it figured out, it was too late and too expensive. So I took the day off from work (to the eternal joy and happiness of my supervisors, of course[/sarcasm]), and Lex and I went out today and got me a new Mazda6. Nice little 5-speeder. I've yet to get it into 4th gear, and that was taking it out on a highway.

I see myself being a baaaaaad boy in it. *Mweeeheheheheheeee!*

Anywho, yeah, Hannah's sudden surprise disappearance left me a bit shaken that night. I'm glad that Ron's okay, though... She seems capable of taking care of herself plenty well. I don't think she really needs my care and attention. By the by, Ron, where should I send all her books? If you don't have room for them all, or don't want/can't afford to send them all at once, I'll understand. She seemed most interested in the novels I'd gotten her, my mythology book (which she can have), and the history book, but I made sure she was at least versed in the first four forms of basic arithmetic and basic algebra. She's also got basic language CD's and books for Japanese, Spanish, and German sitting here.

Alright, so now that the pleasant stuff is outta the way...

My memory loss is getting worse, and it's not because of Gabriel. More precisely, it's caused by some form of...for lack of a better term for it, a "computer virus" that was uploaded directly into my mind. It's systematically cutting connections which, in turn, is leading to my memory loss. It's going at it slowly, but when Gabriel tried to approach it, it started speeding up.

Good news: Gabe can deal with it, and stop my memory loss.

Better news: Gabe can reverse the process.

Bad news: He's not sure if he can do it before this thing turns me into a drooling vegetable, and he's not sure if the thing can start making any of this permanent, and is leery of pushing it far enough to try.

Worse news: If he reverses the process, I'm going to need a few days just to sort through all the information I've forgotten.

So, question to everyone, do we attempt it, or do I just live with this while we try to figure out an alternate solution?

Uhm... Gabe had some theories...but I don't quite understand. When was the evil version of you in my head...?

And Hannah, thanks for the address PM. I'll send those out right away.

We're calling it a computer virus for lack of anything better to call it, and because it's emulating one in my head... It's systematically "deleting" memories from my mind, and as any computer tech can tell you, it is possible to recover deleted files... It isn't biological in nature, we're not sure what it is, or where it came from.

Gabe thinks it's from some nightmare guy...

...Dammit, did I say that already...? *checks...* "Evil version"...of Ron...?

...I hate this. It's getting worse, I know it is... I don't even know how I know, it's just something I can feel. I don't know what I'm forgetting, how much I'm forgetting, but this has got to stop...

Wish us luck. We're going in.

Maybe see a therapist? There's meds out there for forgetfulness and stuff. You should seek out help immediately

Are you absolutely sure about that? I love it when confrontations with doctors can be avoided, but psychiatric help is one thing I don't mess around with. They've helped me out quite a bit in recent past, I still think Josh should see someone. I guess I really don't know the situation, but it's the most reasonable solution I can think of. Don't play around when it comes to your mind. If you really know what you can do to cure it, that's great... But if it's a witch-doctor theory, I advise against it.

From the sounds of a wound like this, the 'virus' is probably cutting the connections between sections of the brain.

To put it simply, as you learn somthing, the pattern of mental activity that came from learning it is ingraned into your mind. Often, learning requires that new connections be formed between segments of the brain. The more connections you have, the faster you process information through, thus, the smarter you are.

But breaking those connections slows the brain down and makes information unrecoverable. That's usualy what happens in injury based amnesia cases, and why people usualy end up recovering from it. The broken connections get re-attached as you re-learn the actions you had made that had formed the connections in the first place, and thus the inacessable memory gets restored.

Well, I suspect that Gabe will probably fix the problem by feeding Josh his own memories telepathicaly. The reintroduction of information will cause his brain to reform the connections, and he'll return to normal.

Gabe, you gotta get over this owe shit. That isn't any way to be a good guy and reclaim anything.

And it is a little creepy.

KonThaak wrote:He will owe me for this.

The way I see it you owe him for your very existence.

We're still not sure what was in my head...

As for debts...I think we'll just be keeping that stuff personal from now on. He has saved my life numerous times, and all he has from me, aside from his creation, is years of getting screwed over...

Anywho, like I said, though, we're working it out.

My memories are coming back.

Now listen here you amoralistic phantom, I can't do anything about the non-physical. I asked several times whether or not I could actually do something constructive.

Now I don't keep track of my debt or debtors. I don't do what I do so it is repaid. I helped you and KT out before because it is my nature to do so. The same with rescuing Holister or anyone else. So if I balk at your debt collecting and it offends you, kiss my ass. I don't operate that way and I've made my opinion known and that's the end of what you'll hear from me.

KT, let me know if you need anything. You know I am very nearby. Same goes for you Gabe. You watched my metaphysical backside when I was dealing with Fate and Loki, I appreciate that.

~.~; I'm just keeping out of this one...

Good reply.

A split personality? Possesing entity? Maybe you are the one Mr. Li said I should look for?

And sorry if i seem like a "self absorbed little twit", a label given to me when I started setting up measuring devices when I accompanied Mr. Li to an exorcism. But I suppose since my desire to know how and why things work comes first the shoe fits.

Nothing self-absorbing about that..

Josh, you I like. You have done alot for the society and sacraficed your own health {both physical and spiritual}
to do so. I respect you, and wish you and your family well.

However Gabe is an arrogant, self righteous prick who is no better than Jeremiah and I hope that he finally chokes on those f**king amulets I gave him when they finally burn his ass out.

Everyone and their alter ids.