Back to Iraq OR The Turtle's Great Flight

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 2:05 pm

Kolya had cut a deal with a small Merc outfit. They would provide me transport to Iraq where they were going bounty hunting anyway in return for $5,000 American. A lot of money to be sure, but I agreed to wire the money into their account as soon as I reached American Soil. Getting to the airfield was fraught with trouble. At one point I had to hang from the undercarriage of a truck to get past a security checkpoint that was looking for me.

After sneaking my way past guards I made it to the Merc's plane, an ancient, rusted junker of a plane. They told me that the price had doubled or they'd turn me in for the reward. Never, ever, ever trust a Mercenary. I didn't have any choice but to agree.

Before long we were in the air and flying over Afghanistan. Somewhere over the open desert an explosion rocked the plane, tearing an enormous hole in the cabin. Two of the Mercs who were standing up and not buckled in were sucked up and out immediately. A huge bear of a man was trying to get into the only remaining parachute in the cabin area (the rest had been sucked out of the plane). I pulled my concealed ASP and put a bullet in his head, a surprised look frozen on his face. (Remember kids, thoroughly search people if you plan on double crossing them and taking the last parachute.)

I grabbed the chute and put it on, we weren't flying very high up at all, so I was in the position of having to pull the cord as soon as I was clear of the aircraft.

As I floated down to Terra Firma, I tried guiding my descent but failed miserably and almost tangled my lines. I was forced to watch and wait and see where Fate put me down. "Oh well, things couldn't get much worse, right?" I asked myself. If only I knew what was in store for me next.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 10:18 am

Never trust a merc... especially a Russian merc.

They are worse than cats.

If they did not make you pay up front, you may want to check on friends and family...

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 10:28 am

Well, I'm 99% sure they're all dead now. But I'll do that. More story to come later, I got busy relating what happened inside KT's mindscape and I never got back to this thread.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 11:32 am

They may be, but arrangements could have been...arranged.

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 11:39 am

I just got off the horn with my dad. A group of thugs tried to take him out at work.

I don't think they realized how tough Iron Workers are.

One ended up with a piece of rebar in his skull, one got tossed off the 10th story of a building, and the last guy bought it at the end of a welding torch.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 12:09 pm

nice work.

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 12:11 pm

Yeah. The guys on his team helped, of course. Then the Electricians saw what was going on and helped. Then the Tilesetters. Even the Carpenters joined in at the end. Imagine 30 or so workers descending upon 3 guys in an environment where the 30 has complete superiority.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 12:14 pm

Imagined.

Holister · Post by **Holister** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 12:16 pm

I really like your pop there Bert. I see where you get your moxy from.

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 12:17 pm

Haha, damn straight.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 12:40 pm

moxy?

Bert_the_Turtle · Post by **Bert_the_Turtle** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 12:45 pm

Moxie:
1. vigor; verve; pep.
2. courage and aggressiveness; nerve.
3. skill; know-how.

Kolya · Post by **Kolya** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 12:52 pm

Oh, thanks.

GhostSpider · Post by **GhostSpider** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 1:29 pm

Sounds like your dad is one tough dude bert. Glad to hear he wan't injured.

And what the hell are you doing in Iraq?

Shadowstalker · Post by **Shadowstalker** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 1:58 pm

That is a long story that he has already posted some of, I just need to finish the story of how we got to Russia. Glad to here your Family is ok Bert.